song of the day: taking chances, glee cast.

heyhey! i hope you've been having a fabulous week! i'm going to try something new today. yesterday, i was piddling around on my computer, and i found this thing that i'd written at the end of high school. i'd completely forgotten that i'd written down my most significant romantic misadventures up till summer 2007. i found myself crying laughing at how different things used to be. not only have i changed, but my approach to guys has changed a lot. but i'm not really sure who or what i was writing it for! so i've decided to share it here. just for fun. i mean, i haven't had time to write real articles lately. so hopefully this'll tide me over until things get less hectic!

and i'm going to give you the chance to play love guru. after each story, give me your best advice! okay, here's the intro i wrote:

no boy has ever made me cry.

believe they've certainly given me reason to. but when it comes down to it. i just can't do it. i'm not going to pretend there's anything special about me. it's just a fact.

and that's what i aim to present to you. the real facts in my lovestruck and irony-prone existence.

as much as it will kill me not to make my life more interesting - or less sad - i will keep everything as honest as possible. the only thing i am doing is changing everyone's name: to protect them, but particularly to protect myself.

i've never been kissed either. i've never had a boyfriend. so i'm guessing that you're thinking the fact that I actually have a rather sizable collection of romantic misadventures is rather odd. but, it's doable. you'll see.

and the first story: rory.

i feel even though there are a few of them, i should start with a highlight. in grade ten i had a monster crush on a guy i will now call rory. he was and still is my perfect crush archetype. male, most importantly. and tall, one of the most important factors. i have this thinking about liking guys who are shorter than me. it's just awkward, when you're holding hands; in your prom photos; at the altar. i'm on the tall side (5'7'') already and don't need to feel anymore awkward so it's best to just nip that one in the bud. luckily rory was plenty tall, a good 6'4''. he was artistic, that's a must. i do a little bit of everything; drama club, piano for 10 years, flute for 5. i sketch a bit, not that i'd ever show anyone. i write so much you'd think it was my job. (it's not, but i really wish it was.) rory played the drums and the bass, always keeping the beat. he had gorgeous red hair. and he was funny. and it just so happened that we had every class together 2nd semester in grade 10, so i was pretty much doomed from the start.

i spent a great deal of time staring at rory and not a lot of time talking to him. so if he did know i had a crush on him, he was a really good sport about it. he must have caught me ogling him at least a hundred times. he responded well to my christmas card that greeted him with "hey hottie." (a decision i still regret to this day.) he didn't even say anything when i quite clearly switched with norah to get him as my partner when the school secretary taught a ballroom dancing class. (he was a really good sport about that one, and a really good dancer. and he proved he was fun when we turned our "frame" into a bumper car and purposely started knocking other people off balance.)

but the highlight happened in grade ten english. i love my teacher for that class chiefly because she let us study family guy instead of reading to kill a mockingbird like all the other classes. we didn't skip the shakespeare though, and i'm glad for that:

rory and i got to read the balcony scene.

i didn't say much in my classes then, and i still don't. but rory had been reading the part of romeo all class long and as soon as act two, scene two came up my hand shot up out of its socket. teachers always pick the quiet kids when they finally do participate, just a little something i've picked up.

so i got to stand on a chair and speak in a fake british accent while rory professed his love for me below. i know he didn't mean it, but in the moment it felt like he did.

rory spawned a lot of bad poetry that semester. but oscar wilde said "all bad poetry springs from genuine feeling," and i firmly believe it. there could have been something there. but the next semester we had no classes together and rory started going out with a girl I believe he is still dating today*. i moved on. but the good thing is: light always breaks through yonder window.

that was difficult. i've never written non-fiction before and the temptation to make it more interesting was tempting. like a kiss at the end of the balcony scene or at the very least, making myself seem like less of a loser. but i've vowed to write things as they happened and that's what i'll do.

*author's note: rory dated that girl for about three years, but they're no longer together.

they get so much better i promise! but the way that i've written them, like the flow of it, is too right to mess up. i might post the next one tomorrow, maybe even later today! i'm that excited.

oh, if only high school B knew what i know now! but my question to you is, how has the way you crush on guys changed since high school? and, does anyone else find gingers as attractive as i do?

there are so many more stories to come! stay tuned!

xoxo
-B.

got the photo from here.