Original Post Date: March 11, 2009
(song of the day: risky business, the cab)

i've been thinking about my scorecard theory a lot in the last few days, and now i'm writing about it. you''re forewarned, it's super idealistic and cliché, but you're just going to have to live with it =P i've kind of noticed that friends, subconsciously, always carry this scorecard with them. i don't even think it's our fault that we, as humans, have been conditioned to make sure things are always "fair." for the most part, people only want to do something good for someone else when they get something out of it. give a little, get a little. if not equality, equity. i'm speaking in generalities here, cause i'm sure not everyone thinks this way, but it feels like favours have become a currency all their own. (like, i don't feel like listening to her today, i talked her through her last fight with her boyfriend BUT she gave me a ride home the other day. so i guess i'll listen after all) pesonally, i know i'm less inclined to help someone who isn't helpful to me. i'm certainly hoping now that i'm not the only person who thinks this or i've just outed my self as a total heartless bitch. anyway...

yesterday i was talking with a friend of mine about this girl he'd been kind of annoyed with. whenever they were talking, she wasn't listening to what he had to say, but when she had a problem she kind of automatically demanded that he be there to listen. i'm pretty sure everyone has a friend like that. (i think i've got at least three. pahaha.) and my first instinct is always to back away from those type people. i never actually do, but i find it really hard to be there for people who aren't there for me. it's like whatever happened to, i'll scratch your back, you scratch mine? it's the scorecard theory =P

funny enough, the weekenders were the ones to remind me about the importance of being a good friend. did anyone see that episode where tish tells them they owe her favours? she draws up this "friendshp score" card thing and pretty much bullies them into helping her with her science experiment. that situation's a little different, but i was really thinking about it one day while i was on stirke.

some people say that when they help others they get that "good" feeling by the end of it. which is fine, but not necessarily true. i mean, if you're expecting to feel good by the end of it, you're still EXPECTING to get something out of whatever you're doing. i think if you're being truly selfless, it's probably NOT going to feel good. sometimes being there for someone else when you've got other things to do is awkward or untimely. sometimes it just sucks. i'm sure we've all sat through rants when you've got a big paper due, or gone out somewhere you really don't want to, or spent time with someone you'd rather not. bottom line though, i'd rather have a selfless friend, than a selfish one. so i got to thinking that's the type of friend i have to be. haha. cheesy, i know. but you were warned!

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in other news today, i did what i promised never to do and paid for it. i took a day off when it came to style. but this morning, i got a cold, goy my period and got into a HUGE thing with my mom. i grabbed a hoodie and went out the door. so of course today, the most GORGEOUS guy i've ever seen at glendon strolls into my french class and sits beside me. i'm talking newsboy cap, plaid shirt, jeans, CONVERSE shoes, gorgeous flippy brown hair, appropriate level of scruff, really nice eyes, great laugh, hot name (patrick). you know who he looks like? a white version of that guy danny from work, not sure if you've heard me go on about him (well, i know jenn has. haha) and on top of all that, he might not even be gay! his voice was of normal male timbre, he wasn't carrying a purse, and his french was actually pretty bad! you know how rare that is at glendon? but yeah, i must have looked a hot mess after spending the morning crying. it was grrrrrreat. tomorrow it's back to fabulous! (i'll probably have a fashion/beauty related blog too, watch out!)


-lovelovelove.